Monday, November 10, 2008

Waiting for the inevitable

We won't get out of this alive--life that is. While that's true for most of us, for my dad it's become a matter of a few days or at most a week or two. I'm thankful he is now in hospice care where they are making him comfortable as he prepares to leave this life for the next. And so I'm waiting for the inevitable phone call to tell me he is gone.

In the meantime, I'm trying to stay focused on the obligations that keep me tethered here rather than at his side. And on the small joys that God keeps providing in my life to keep me going. This weekend, our youngest son and his son, our youngest grandson, came unexpectedly for a few hours. Our grandson is crawling everywhere now at the speed of greased lightning. He's also pulling up on any stationary object and occasionally letting go, so he'll be walking soon. He and I had fun playing peek-a-boo around the furniture while his dad and my husband watched football. He's such a happy, even-tempered, loving little guy. His presence eased the hurt in my heart.

So did the visit by our two oldest grand kids a few hours later. We got to keep them while their mom and and dad went to a college reunion. We played with the dogs, had mac and cheese and applesauce for supper, had a fire in the fireplace, watched Peter Pan after baths, and had a slumber party with the kids on sleeping bags in our bedroom. For a time, I forgot about everything else but the joy of being with these happy,loving little kids.

I'm also grateful for my class at the university. At first I felt guilty about having agreed to teach just a week or so before my dad was taken so ill. But as the semester has progressed and I've come to know these wonderful students, I've realized that God has provided me with yet another blessing to see me through this time. I cannot change what is happening with my dad, and he is in God's good hands in any case. Thank God for that! So I have the class to keep me busy, and the students who are a joy to teach.

God is good. All the time. Even now when life is sad, and my heart is heavy.

Grace and Peace,
Donna Sue