Wednesday, January 23, 2008

I've become a "Hon"

Sometime in the past few months I seem to have crossed over some invisible barrier in my life's journey. Recently my health care providers, as well as my young physician, have started to refer to me as "Hon." Granted the ones I'm thinking about are young enough to be my children, and I am approaching 60 at warp speed. But I confess I'm not sure how I feel about this development. On the one hand, I prefer "Hon" to other nicknames I could conjure up, but on the other hand it makes me feel that old age is catching up with me. I'm nearly certain this form of address is a term of endearment and that no harm is meant, but I also came of age when being called "Hon" under some circumstances could start a demonstration or at least an argument. So perhaps that's why this whole experience has made me uneasy. Or perhaps I would not have taken notice at all, except that I'm keenly aware that I will be 60 in a couple of years, and that has me more focused on my age, something I don't ordinarily spend a lot of time contemplating.

I guess ideally I had hoped somehow that in my old age I would be referred to as one of those individuals the Psalmist compares to "trees planted by streams of water, which yield their fruit in its season, and their leaves do not wither. In all that they do, they prosper." Now that seems to me to be a worthy goal for any one's life. I suppose I could tell these young women I'd much prefer to be called a tree, instead of a "Hon," but somehow I don't think they would understand. Maybe someday they will, but by then I'll have long since passed from this life to the next, hopefully after having left some worthy fruit behind in God's good creation.

Grace and Peace,
Donna Sue

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Our times are in your hands

I remember learning a Bible verse when I was a little girl, "our times are in your hands." Of course at the moment I cannot remember exactly where in the Bible the verse can be found. Today we made the long trip to Houston and back again to visit my husband's father and his wife. My father-in-law is seriously ill and for the first time as he nears 90 he looks like an old man. He is in pain and not thinking clearly, and his wife is struggling to care for him. My husband seems to be taking this better than my sons at this point. They are worried about their grandfather, for all that he has not made a lot of effort to spend much time with them. He has made some effort over the years. My prayer partners are praying for the doctors to figure out what is wrong with him. His wife hopes once they figure it out, they will be able to make him better. My husband is not so sure. Probably that comes from being a doctor himself.

Coincidentally, not long ago I had a conversation with my own father about death. He will be 85 this year and is slowing down considerably. I've been amazed at how well he has coped with blindness these last few years, but his body is slowing down and he seems to miss my mom more with each passing year, even though she's been gone for 15 years now. Perhaps as the discomfort of pregnancy eventually makes labor and delivery seem less terrifying, so our aging bodies eventually make the promise of what a good pastor friend calls "the next adventure" seem less frightening.

I'm glad I remember the verse from my childhood, and I'm even more glad that I know in the depths of my soul that my times are indeed in God's hands. As one seminary professor said, they are good hands, you know. I hope I can remember that when it's my time to move on to the next adventure. As I told my dad, as my body continues to age, sometimes not at all gracefully, I am slowly learning that at some point it will not be such a bad thing to lay down this wonderful life for the one to come. I think that's what my dad was trying in his oblique way to tell me himself.

Grace and Peace,
Donna Sue

Friday, January 11, 2008

Back to the Beginning

My husband and I went to our first Conversational Chinese class last night, and we are going to learn more than conversation including some reading and some writing of Chinese characters. The teacher is a young woman from China, and her enthusiasm and encouragement are contagious. She believes we can do this, so I'm willing to suspend my own disbelief and charge ahead. My husband and I have actually been working for many months on learning to speak some Mandarin Chinese using CDs that our son loaned us. He's learning Chinese as well, but he has a wife who speaks it so he has an advantage we are lacking. We have good motivation, however, as our daughter-in-law is speaking Chinese to our baby suinzi (that's our grandson). We want to be able to understand him when he starts babbling. Hopefully we can learn enough to learn along with him when he starts talking.

As we headed out for class last night, I remembered something I'd not thought about in years and that is that my husband and I met as freshmen in college over 40 years ago. Standing in the bookstore line this morning waiting to buy the textbook for the class, I told my husband I had never pictured myself going back to college as a grandmother. Life does have a way of circling around upon itself, and God does have a wonderfully, wacky sense of humor. Even if I had thought about returning to school someday back when I was a college student, I would never in my wildest dreams have envisioned signing up for Chinese lessons!

But now I get to have two nights a week back at college with my college sweet heart, who's the only one who calls me Donna Sue. What a blessing, and something to make my heart sing an old almost-forgotten song.

Grace and Peace,
Donna Sue

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Reading and Writing

I spent three days this past week with Christian writers from around the country at the annual writers' festival at the local university where I taught this past year. It was such an amazing experience to listen to these remarkable poets and authors read from their works, and to participate in workshops with them to try to improve my writing skills. If you have not encountered Angela O'Donnell, Alan Berecka and Anne McCrady's poetry, you are missing out. They write beautifully about life and about God. Spending that much time in the company of those who use the English language to create works of great beauty was a real privilege. It inspires me to keep working to hone my skills. That will give me plenty of work to do this in this New Year. Part of me wishes it were easier, but in my heart of hearts I also know that if it were too easy I would rapidly become bored.

On the reading front, members of our church are participating in a program to read through the Bible this year, something I've not sat down and done cover to cover, though I've read large chunks of it. I started this afternoon and am enjoying reading Eugene Peterson's The Message, which is a translation written in contemporary language. It was especially fun to read the story of Noah after having watched the movie Evan Almighty this past week. I could easily picture all the animals and laughed when I read the last verse in Chapter 6. After God has told Noah to collect two of every species of bird, mammal and reptile to save them from the flood, God then tells Noah, "Also get all the food you'll need and store it up for you and them." Even with a large ark that's a lot of food and a lot of grocery shopping! What a great story that has come down to us from centuries ago. I'm going to enjoy the reading assignments this year.

Grace and Peace,
Donna Sue